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It’s only a matter of time before he adds a coffee table.

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…a girl takes off her pants.

There are a few sure-fire ways to get me in my underwear. For our purposes here at E.I.Y.U., I’ll get to the more relevant method: meat. And Noah Bernamoff, owner of Mile End Delicatessen in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn, makes the meat that does the trick.

I’m a fan of the deli’s poutine with smoked meat, a Quebec classic composed of a mound of French fries topped with cheese curds and slathered with gravy. Chunks of house-smoked meat are, to me, less the icing on the cake, and more an integral part of this dish.

Go to Mile End, eat the meat, and take off the pants*. If not because the meat will do for you what it does for me, then at least because you need to expand.

*Please do not do this in public. Wait till you get home, will ya? Perv.