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the underwear diet

vegetarian chili

December 31, 2011
the main event, the underwear diet
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I know that you’re supposed to have soup when you’re sick, but after trying this–gulp–vegetarian chili, it hit the spot. Maybe I still feel like $#!+, but at least I had a taste of comfort food, and all I had to do was a little prep work the night before, and turn the slow cooker on in the morning.

I came home from work, spooned some chili into a big bowl and topped it with Greek yogurt and sliced scallions.*

You can find the recipe here, on the Real Simple website. Take the opportunity to actually enjoy this meatless chili; I’m not saying it’s better than a beefy variety, but it’s damn tasty.

*Please note: when I am sick, there is little motivation for me to eat in my underwear; however, once I recover, I’ll be stripping down to enjoy this little number. And I won’t feel guilty after polishing off a bowl (or two).

my cousin vinny would approve

November 20, 2011
somethin' on the side, the underwear diet
3 Comments

If you’re Italian, you call it polenta. If you’re from the South, it’s known as grits. I call it delicious. This creamy side dish errs on the side of indulgence, but when plated with leaner fare, it creates a healthy dish that actually satisfies.

I used medium-ground cornmeal, which gave the dish a chewy texture. Prepare the polenta according to the package’s directions; I recommend using whole milk in place of water. Once cooked through, toss in corn (fresh, frozen or canned will all work) and season generously with S & P, butter and cheese (I used Pecorino Romano, but you could easily substitute with Parmigiano Reggiano, or even smoked Gouda or cheddar cheese).

I served the creamy polenta with salmon and sauteed spinach:

I didn’t feel the least bit self-conscious when I stripped down to my underwear at the end of the night. And neither did my S.S. And, I’m sure, neither would my cousin Vinny.

french onion dip

November 13, 2011
somethin' on the side, the underwear diet
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A birthday celebration with my best friends from high school usually involves a high level of ethanol and specific foods fit for eating after a night of dancing and drinking. These foods are generally rich in saturated fats that plagues you with great guilt the next day.

Keeping this in mind, I made one of my best friends’ favorites to satisfy our cravings and alleviate some of the morning-after shame: French onion dip. This recipe replaces the sour cream with non-fat plain Greek yogurt, retaining creaminess and cutting much of the fat.

Caramelize sliced onions in oil and season with S & P. During the last minute of cooking, add minced garlic. Remove from the pan and cool. Once the onions have come to room temperature, combine with mayonnaise, yogurt and chopped fresh parsley. Season with lemon juice and S & P, to taste.

Refrigerate for at least two hours or overnight. This dip gets better with time, and you’d never notice that it contains half the fat of traditional French onion dip.

So whether or not you eat these in your underwear, your booty will thank you in the morning.

roasted chi chi beans

November 1, 2011
somethin' on the side, the underwear diet
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Strange, but addictive. I rinsed a can of chick peas, dried them well, and tossed with a touch of canola oil, salt and a bunch of spices from the bowels of my cabinet, including curry powder and cayenne pepper. Roasted them in a 450-degree Fahrenheit oven for about 30 minutes, until they were crisp outside and tender inside.

The result was a curiously tasty snack that would compliment happy hour. They will not help your hangover, though, as they are not so good the next day.

Roasted chi chi beans are a good snack to have if you’re trying to watch your figure (though, if that’s the case, I reluctantly have to suggest consuming them sans happy hour libations).

braised celery

October 23, 2011
somethin' on the side, the underwear diet
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Whenever I buy celery, I wind up using two measly stalks and find the bunch weeks later, somewhere in the dark part of the refrigerator, flavorless and pliable. My celery intentions always begin pure, but I usually screw them up along the way.

Not this time.

No, this time I was going to let this fibrous vegetable shine in a simple side dish of braised celery. Cut the celery on a bias to the desired length. In a deep pan, heat a bit of butter and sear the celery on both sides. Once browned, add stock (I used chicken) to just cover the vegetables. Bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer and cover. Braise until the celery is cooked to your liking (I like it pretty soft).

Remove the celery and reduce the stock to thicken. Season to taste with S & P and pour over the celery.

Warning: This is a healthy recipe. You may find it’ll cause you to feel good about the way you look, and, subsequently, you may end up removing your pants. Go with it.